‘I said I’m cooking spaghetti,’ I lied, I had no idea why I said that. But that lie was already a part of me — so much so that, at that moment at least, it didn’t feel like a lie at all.
I went ahead and filled an imaginary pot with water, lit an imaginary stove with an imaginary match.
‘So?’ She asked.
I sprinkled imaginary salt into the boiling water, gently lowered a handful of imaginary spaghetti into the imaginary pot, setting the imaginary kitchen timer for twelve minutes.
‘So I can’t talk. The spaghetti will be ruined.’
She didn’t say anything.
‘I’m really sorry, but cooking spaghetti’s a delicate operation.’
The year of spaghetti
Blind Willow, Sleeping Woman
by Haruki Murakami
Well, here we are again together mate. You haven’t spoken to me for a really long, long time. Have you missed me? From my side, I have to say yes indeed! I reckon that you thought that summer will help you out having an easier life – won’t you? Some how everything bad will be erased from your mind and hearth: low self-esteem, cold winters, no one to spoon on Sundays morning, ha, you even thought that your family would have a much better life – ha, you are a very naive man really! That is why I told you: DO NOT leave me buddy, you should stay by my side and keeping yourself anonymous to avoid that your landing could be as painful as it has always been. But, you have never ever learnt it – Who has?
Everybody does have same kind of high expectations about their lives during summer, and to be fair, why shouldn’t they? There are a lot of great things happening during summer time: warm weather, girls and boys having BBQ, getting drunk and, for the grand finale, admiring spectacular sunsets on beach. Ha, ha, ha, ha… Enjoying the view is my favourite activity during the summer, my buddy – is it not yours as well?
It’s a shame that you don’t love me as I do love you. Eh!? What are you staring at on that window? Please, a bit of respect for your best mate here opposite to you. When I am talking to you then I’m expecting all your attention focussed on me. So, please, I kindly ask you to stop staring at your deformed and rounded shape. Looking at reflections for prolonged periods of time won’t help you to changing or solving sad situations like yours. Besides, you already have to much to feel disappointed about your life, and not just the poor state of your health. You haven’t learnt to accept that being a fatty boy has been your self-decision, and the same applies for your lack of attitude towards tackling your extra weight.
Anyways, where I was? Oh, yeah, summer, my love, your absence, and all that shit. My point is that you are always coming back to look for me, no matters, what you or the surroundings have attempted to fight against your urgency to come and talk to me… There are two main reasons for that to happen: a) you are so fucking alone on earth and b) you are locked out yourself inside your own oneself!!!!